I believe the term is ‘jammed’. Possibly ‘wedged’. ‘Shoe-horned’?

And this is what happens if we don’t put our little metal men out of the reach of someone’s evil grasping hands. GOJIRA ATTACK RAR!

And finally… let’s take a moment to study this picture and see if we can figure out the two things that happened while someone’s mother was at work.

Got it yet?

Yep, you got it.

It’s not like she has ever had Sudocrem in her eyes, but apparently Dolly had an eye-rash that needed attention. Also an arm-rash, a hair-rash, a tummy-rash, a knee-rash and a clothes-rash.

Oh, and it seems the bedroom had a carpet-rash. >_<

• Baby recognises dodgy doodles of Elmo, kitty and her blanky. Some of them get kisses. I would like kisses. #
• Baby spat out some chewed hot cross bun, noticed it on the floor and handed it to me saying 'eeeew poo'. Mmhmm. #
• Seems old-school James Bond moves still make me sleepy. ~_~ #
• I had no idea you could get prescription swimming goggles. That's potentially life-changing! Or as much of it as is spent underwater. #
• The builder next door is TOUCHING MY WINDOWS. Dude, I'm right here. Stop demoing your crap to the neighbours on my property. Boundaries! #
• Folks, I believe we're actually having a morning nap. And by we, I don't mean me. Though I wish I did. Mmm… sleep… #
• Freakin Foodtown online not processing my payment properly and making me miss out on early delivery. Usually good, but this time RARARAR. #
• So tired. Don't know why. It's not like someone woke me up early this morning by walking into a door with a set of dumbells in his hands. #
• Nap. Nap! NAP! #
• Baby's walking round with arms full of dollies and blankies. I'm waiting to see if she'll manage to put herself to bed. #
• ORLY? http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10629591 #
• Yay, someone I know is happy. Which makes me happy. Are you happy that I'm happy? #itsthecircleofhappy #
• I'm being peer-pressured to make turbaconducken. I might actually give in this time, cause OMGBACON. http://bit.ly/2bCP #
• Mmm… good office-coffee… #
• Tried to get a photo of me 'n she for a new profile pic. Took it, checked it out. One of us had a finger up her nose. #
• Just got offered a kitten! The answer is of course 'SHE would love one, but we have 2 cats so we'll stick to watching'. Adulthood sucks… #
• It'd be nice if yawny, eye-rubby baby would actually nap instead of sitting in her cot making random noises. -I- would like a nap! #
• Up til 3:20 this morning due to some unidentified baby-butt-bug. She was perfectly happy awake, but screamed if put to bed. Rackin frackin. #

• I don't know why she thinks I'll care when she throws her dolly out of the cot to protest her nap. It's not MY dolly. I'm not missing out. #
• I possibly went slightly overboard taking photos. Which is unusual! >.> #
• Japanese curry rice with grated apple and sausage, yes. Spoon wrangling still lacks finesse. #
• I have decided not to worry when that baby sings to Lady Gaga. Even if she doesn't sing to anything else. There's still time to train her. #
• No wind today so too hot to go out. Yesterday was so nice too. So unfair. :( #
• Satay noodles? Yes. Sweetcorn bao? Yes. Crazyasian 'Choco Pie' cookie? Duh. Clicking pen with forehead? GLEE! What have I created? #
• I so love it when she ever-so-delicately tries and rejects a new food. Grated carrot? No. Maybe if I put raisins in it… >.> #
• I like this weather. #
• Oh you wacky asian snacks. You're so edible and yet so very strange. #
• Watched Drag Me To Hell, finally. Another perpetrator of the 'any horror movie w/ cute pet must include death of said cute pet' cliché. Grr. #
• Mmm satay noodles n prawns… #
• Just submitted an expense claim for sending 2008's xmas cards. I win the receipt-keeping-game! Probably lost the prompt-claim-game however. #
• At least the guy who called in for a phone number found it amusing when I couldn't find my list. New desk arrangement FTL. :\ #
• 'That Guy' site loses on account of not including Troy Evans. Who is in EVERYTHING. http://www.460xvr.com/tg/not.htm #
• Yay for new desk! BOOOO for being located in the secretary position. >_< #
• Woo net. 1 minute up, 15 minutes down… I love living in the technologically advanced future. I love my flying car and robot servant. #
• Stoopid dropping stoopid net ALL DAY. Get your shiz together intartubes! #
• Damn you, daily sale site! Why didn't you have these things for sale a month ago? Oh well, I'll buy some more. :D #
• Banged the everloving crap out of my little toe. Again. I should just amputate. #
• Is it a good thing when your eyes dance across a line of text and you can neither focus on the words nor process meaning? Ima go with 'yes'. #
• Next place we move to has to be quieter. Think we'll camp for a day or two to see how annoying the neighbours are before signing. #
• Giggle: http://is.gd/8Uyxy #
• Now working 'pool' side while someone splashes out her angries. #
• Got a baby for sale again. Love her, lots. Just want to sell her – to share the joy, you understand. #
• Thought the cat wanted loves. Turned out he wanted the leftover cereal milk in my bowl. I lose to muesli. :( #
• Why is it whenever you need something off someone they take their sweet time, but they expect you to do stuff for them NOWNOWNOW? Fie. #
• Rescued the first cicada of the day. #
• So it seems I am Mean for not agreeing compost water is a neat thing to play with. #

Today we broke out the paint.

We also made friends with the little asian boy across the way, and with his Aunty, who says Amelie is just lovely. Yep. A lovely baby who calls strangers over and holds their hands through the fence while her mother is inside making dinner, oblivious.

Anyway, PAINT.

It started so serenely. She’d actually made some lovely little fingerpainty messes before I arrived with the camera. Then we released our inner Pollock.

Taking finger painting literally.

Luffly. Incidentally, it took her 3 minutes to taste the paint (green). She whined and screwed up her face and made cute little ‘ptt ptt’ noises while I tried to wipe it out. That’ll larn her.

Although fun, tasty paint cannot compete with the draw of the garden.

Specifically, it cannot compete with the draw of the cat sleeping in the garden, trying desperately not to be noticed by the baby.

And this would be the ‘KITTYKITTYKITTY!!1!!’ shriek and pose. The kitty didn’t come back – she sat on the fence and watched the rest of the afternoon’s goings-on in safety. It kinda looks like the baby has filed her teeth to cat-eating points in this shot, but that’s probably not the case.

I love this portait. It’s slightly devious.

This one is more innocent, which would be why I prefer the first. More true to life. Aww wookit the squeezable wittle cheeks awwww…

I shall frame her creations. They’ll make nice centrepieces at her 21st.